Quality Assurance

"Just... ugh, explain it to me again, okay?" I rubbed my eyes in the dull morning glow and sat back down on the sofa. Opposite me, a girl with long jet-black hair, dark makeup and big brown eyes gave an exasperated gasp.

"I don't know how else to explain it to you, dude!" She crossed her arms over her chest, wearing a loose black t-shirt with a digitally distorted skull figure on it.

"Okay alright just... start at the beginning again. You found this 'job posting' on some website?"

She nodded. "About two weeks ago. I'm in need of the cash now that my hours have been cut to almost nothing, and this seemed like a reasonably legitimate gig."

"So you're... being paid to test this... thing."

"Yes." She waved her hands over herself. "This is some kind of weird... suit, that I put on each morning, and then I have to wear it for at least a couple hours a day. Don't ask me how it works!" - She held up a hand before I could even get the words out of my mouth - "I honestly don't know. The woman running the test gave me a box with this suit in it and a trunk of clothing, and just gave me instructions to wear it each day and to send her pictures of me in it. She gave me half the money up front, and promised the rest plus expenses after four weeks."

I just frowned and tried to make sense of it. "... Okay... but it... turned you into a... a chick?"

She raised an eyebrow and gave a half-shrug. "I guess so. I mean. I'm back to normal as soon as I take it off, so it's just temporary."

"But how is that even... you... how does it..."

"I already told you I don't know. It's got this kind of gross slimy surface on the insides, and when I put it on it sticks onto me like a plaster. Once it's on me, I can feel everything as if I wasn't wearing anything special at all, just... feels like real skin, y'know?"

I kept frowning in disbelief as she sat up slightly, opening and closing her right hand on the desk chair opposite me. I had commanded her to sit down there after I'd woken up early and found this stranger rummaging through the kitchen - I thought she was some punk rocker that Dan knew, but when she tried to tell me that she was Dan, I was hesitant to believe her. What if she was some kind of crazy ex?

I stood up and pointed "W-well... okay, if you're really Dan, then, I dunno, tell me something only Dan would know."

"Seriously dude?" She rolled her eyes. "Okay, like... I know your real name isn't Frank, it's Francis but you don't like the way that name sounds, and you broke your arm in middle school trying to ride a skateboard down a staircase, and that you dated Sarah even though you said you didn't l-"

"Okay alright! I believe you, okay?" I rubbed my eyes again. "Fuck... alright... you're Dan."

"Yes!" She relaxed, sighing. "I'm sorry I didn't keep you in the loop, alright?"

"I mean, I don't think I'd have believed you if you had, but... it's alright." I sat back down opposite the weird girl-shaped roommate. "This is a really weird-ass kind of hobby, though."

She pursed her lips defensively, which only made the fact that they had dark red lipstick on them more obvious. "Man it's not, like, for fun or anything! It's for this woman I found on the internet, who actually turned out to be LEGIT, and has already paid me serious cash. She said she was some kind of inventor that specialised in really weird stuff."

I snorted. "To be honest I'm more surprised you actually found a chick on the internet that actually turned out to be a chick!"

She gave a small smile. "Not the usual kind of 'job' on the internet, I guess. It was pretty vague in description, but didn't stink of all the usual fake or scam hallmarks, so I gave it a chance and it turned out to be... this."

I looked her up and down. "So, tell me again - you wear this... you wear 'her' for a couple hours a day and then... that's it?"

"Well, that's what I was told to do at the start. That woman also texts me every now and then asking for some specific stuff, like wear some particular outfit and send her pictures, or sometimes visit her in such and such place to tell her how things are going."

My turn to raise an eyebrow. "Okay, that's... unusual... and how are things going, then?" I was immensely curious by this point.

"Well as you can tell, the thing works pretty damn well, even down to changing how my voice sounds. You could never tell it was me, could you?"

I shook my head. "So that means it's working as expected, right?"

"Well... I mean... I've been experiencing some... weird feelings sometimes if I'm honest."

Seriously dude? "Oh, feelings like 'what the hell are you doing wearing a suit that turns you into a chick for two weeks'?"

She gave me a sour look. "No, actually, smartass. That's been surprisingly easy to adjust to." She stood up and took a step over to look out the window, her hands in her hoodie pockets. "I've been having weird dreams sometimes, and I have this kind of headache after I-..."

"... After you what?"

Her eyes widened. After a millisecond of deduction, I figured it out.

"After you finish jacking off as a woman." I kept a straight face as she spun around, agitated.

"Dude!"

"What? It's obvious! It's literally the first thing everyone would do if they had the chance!"

"But... I know, but it's still... I don't really wanna be talking about that, y'know?"

I huffed. "Understandable. But still, you did it... what's it like? How's it compare?"

She turned around again, hiding her face.

"I'm not gonna... well I'll say it's... different. Just different."

Hm. "Well okay then. You've been, uh, 'testing' this girl out for a while now, and you've been dressing up and meeting this inventor lady, and now you say you've had weird dreams?"

"Not just dreams." She crossed her arms again. "It's like... sometimes I feel it... moving, like without me consciously doing anything, right?" She pulled on her elbow. "It's like those freaky involuntary twitches you get when you smack somethin' just below your kneecap, only it's really slow and hard to notice until it's happened."

"... okay, that's... even weirder. And you've reported this stuff to the lady?"

"Not yet - I can't really say for certain what's even happening, and even if I did I'd have to explain to her that I... well, y'know." She made a vague gesture and I nodded.

"Right, she didn't mention any kind of stuff you shouldn't do or whatever?"

"Nope. And now there's.... " Turning back, she shuffled over to the loosely hanging hall mirror and started feeling around the back of her neck. "... I keep losing it but... there's definitely some kind of... thing sticking out of my neck whenever I'm inside the suit.

"Like what?"

She kept fumbling around, struggling to get a good angle in the mirror. "I don't know - it's like this small plastic protruding thing that only shows up when the suit's on, and I can't find any trace of it when it's off." She blew air through her nostrils in annoyance and walked towards me. "Can you help me out? Right at the back, just below where all the hair starts."

I stood up and looked at her back, seeing soft long black hair, and also reflexively catching a glimpse of her bra-strap as I did.

"I uh... you've got all this hair in the way."

"Well, feel around for it or something. It's in there!"

I gingerly moved her hair away and started feeling around the back of her neck, with a twinge of embarrassment as I couldn't help but feel how soft her pale skin was. After a few seconds of awkwardly rubbing the back of her neck, just below the hairline, my thumb caught on something solid.

"Did- Did you find it? What is it?" she asked.

"I think so. It's... it's like a... " I peered in close. "... a switch?"

"A switch?" she repeated. It was a tiny slider-thing, almost invisible in the tangle of black hair, and was set to the 'up' position.


And without even thinking, I pushed it and it clicked down.


"What- Dude what did you d-" She stammered, before she made a weird gulping noise and gasped, as if electrified.

"Oh- what- are you okay?" I jumped. "I pressed it - are you alright?"

"Guhh!"

She gave a small shiver before her head shot back up, like when you're on the edge of falling asleep and you jolt yourself awake.

"Oh!" She mumbled. "I'm.... uh, I'm fine!"

She spun around to face me, eyes wide. "I'm fine! I uh... I don't know what that did but... I don't think it did anything?"

I gave her a puzzled look. "But it looked like it gave you some kind of shock, or something."

"It did?" She felt at her neck again, nervously patting down her hair. "It uh... didn't really feel like anything, not as far as I can tell."

"Well okay... more weirdness..." I kept looking at her as her eyes scanned up and down me, then briefly around the room. "Are you going to tell the lady about this then?"

"What? Her!? No!" She spun back to face me. "I mean... it's uh, it's really nothing. I'm fine!"

".... oooookay then." I stepped back and gave my head a small shake. "I'm going to finish making the coffee then."

Her huge eyes followed me as I turned and went to the kitchenette, poured out the coffee into two mugs, picked them up and brought them over to the beaten-up coffee table in the centre of the apartment.

"Here you go, dude." I handed one to her before reclining on the sofa again.

"Uh... thanks." She mumbled.

"So... " I took a sip. "... what's, uh... what's next for today?"

She placed the hot mug on the table gently before sitting herself on the sofa beside me, perhaps closer than was absolutely necessary...

"Oh, I, um... didn't really have anything planned for today, as such, y'know..." She tugged the end of her sleeve. "Today was just a, uh, hang out and relax kind of day, I guess?"

"Hang out... okay, that's cool." I squinted slightly at her. "So should I call you Dan or, like, some obvious girl version of it, like 'Danielle'?"

She nodded, still looking around all skittish like. "Yeah, that's, I mean that's fine. Danielle. That'll work."

I just shrugged and turned the TV on. "Okay. Still kinda weird that it's you in there, though. You look hot as hell, dude."

She just stared at me, eyebrows raised. "I do?" Not the response I was expecting...

"Well... yeah, dude. I mean, you... it's a nice looking... suit I guess..." I looked away, my attempt at joking flattery falling flat.

"I mean... that's, uh, cool, I guess." Mumbling again, she turned to face the screen. There was a protracted awkward silence.

"S-so..." she turned back to face me again. "You know... you know how I was talking earlier about... like how I was..."

I worked up the courage to make eye contact again, as her cheeks turned slightly pinker. "... What?"

"... How I was... h-having fun by myself... before..." She slid closer, her knee definitely touching mine now. She had these thigh-high black socks on that reached juuust high enough that they revealed that perfect amount of skin between the top of the socks and the bottom of her plaid skirt... I mean, n-not that I had noticed...

"o-okay, uhm... " My eyes darted from hers to the point of physical contact between us then back. "You said... you didn't want to get into it... with a roommate?" I knew I was turning red in the face as much as she was, now.

"It-It's... it's okay..." She blinked a few times, her eyelashes fluttering. "I mean... I want to... "

She slowly reached forward and put her hands on my arms, while I just blithely watched. Then, leaning in closer and closer, she closed her eyes and kissed me, deeply, passionately.

"Mmh...!?" I could only hum in a bizarre mix of confusion and arousal. She pulled back and opened her eyes, staring right into mine.

"Yeah..." she said beathlessly. She climbed forward, resting her knees on either side of me, before picking up my hands by the wrists and slowly placing them against her chest, making me cup her breasts. I breathed out, exhilarated and delirious. "Wha...?"

"Shhh... It's okay..." she whispered, holding her hands on top of mine, pressing gently into her soft bosom. By now I was at full mast, and involuntarily prodded against her inner thigh with my erection.

Her eyes locked onto mine again and she gave a devilish smile. She whispered, "I know... I saw how you looked at me... you want to... look at some more...?" before sitting up and pulling her hoodie off.

I just sat, awestruck as she pulled up the bottom hem of her band t-shirt and took it off completely, revealing the lacy black bra holding her in underneath. More hand holding and groping her soft body, then she pulled away to stand up and unzip the back of her skirt. Wiggling out of it revealed a matching pair of black panties, and she grinned before climbing on top of me again. I was entranced by her as we kissed again, but as her hands began to feel their way down my stomach and into my pants I had a split-second moment of shocking clarity.

Despite every feeling in the universe telling me not to, I gently pushed her off of me and back up onto her feet.

"What? What's wrong?" She held on to my hands even after I let her arms go.

"I... this... what's happening, dude?" I shook my head, confused. "what's gotten into you? Why are you... I don't..."

A frown crossed her face for the briefest moment. "Hey, I told you, I'm fine! I want... to try this, I want to see what it feels like, yeah?"

I just squinted. "This just feels... too weird right now..."

She put her hands on her hips, still in her underwear before me. "I'm fine! Come on, don't you want this?"

I indulged myself in a look up and down her body. "... I mean... yes, but... this isn't right!"

That frown came back again. "I am fine, okay? You said I was hot, right?"

I pushed myself up and out of the sofa. "I think that switch did something to you..."

"No!" She responded, a little too quickly. "I'm fi-"

"And you keep saying that you're fine!" I interrupted, squinting at her. "Someone who's fine doesn't have to keep repeating it so much."

She stammered for a couple of seconds, then sighed and closed her eyes.

"I'm... just... I just wanted to try it out, okay?" she pouted. "What's the harm in a little fun?"

I paused, thinking.

"Well... uh... I guess it's not... that big a deal..." I murmured, giving her another look all over, taking her in.

"Yeah...!" She pulled my arms around her again as I slowly sat back down, gazing deep into her eyes. "Let's just... take it slow again..."

I closed my eyes and leaned in for more kissing, my hands gently sliding up her back. She responded in kind, and we embraced for another moment before my hands reached the base of her neck. As subtly as I could, I opened my eyes and felt for the switch.

She realised what I was doing a second too late, and I managed to uncover the tiny plastic nub right as her eyes shot open in panic. Before she could do anything more, I pressed upwards hard on the back of her neck and pulled away from the kiss.

"but-" betrayal flashed in her eyes before she did the weird gulp-spasm thing again, and I grabbed her shoulders as she went limp.

"Hey! Dan... Danielle, or whatever! Hey!"

I gave her a light shake as her head lolled to the side, and this seemed to bring her back to her senses.

"Gah!" a gasp escaped her lips. "Fuck! oh god....!"

"Are you okay, for real this time?"

She pulled away from me, rising and taking a step back.

"I- you fucking idiot!" she hissed at me. "You pressed that damn switch! Don't do that if you don't know what it does! Ffffuck!"

I just shrugged. "I'm sorry! Damn!"

"She took over completely... I was trapped!" Danielle grabbed at her discarded clothes, holding them over herself and cringing. "Oh god... it felt..."

I apologised again and stood up, but she just turned and sprinted into her room.

"I need to get out of this suit, and I need to take a damn shower!" she yelled back, indignant.


An hour later, Dan unlocked his room door and slid out.

"Okay... that was messed up."

I turned at the sound of his voice, still feeling somewhat guilty.

"... uh yeah, sorry..."

Dan just shrugged.

"You know what... it wasn't... horrifically bad or anything, just... scary. And trying to take her off was... difficult for a while. She was sorta... deeply embedded."

There was a silence.

"... Oooookay soooo... what are you gonna do? Are you returning the suit... Danielle, to that woman?"

Dan glanced back at his door. "... no, not yet at least. I'm gonna finish the testing. And I'm gonna tell her about the weird stuff happening, but... uh... not mention anything after the... y'know."

"... Right. Fair enough." I turned back to the TV, Dan went back into his room, and we spent the rest of the day in silence.




3 days later, I was half-heartedly cleaning up the kitchen late at night when Danielle came in the front door and walked into the room. We'd been sorta avoiding each other for a while, so I had no idea that she's even gone out.

"Oh! uh, hi" she said, "I didn't realise you were still up..."

"Hey..." I responded, unsure how to react. This was the first time I'd seen Danielle since that freaky morning.

"I was, uh, out." She sorta waved her handbag (when did she get a handbag?) and showed how she was wearing a sparkly silver club dress over black pantyhose and silver heels, clacking as she walked over to me.

"I've been thinking... about what happened before, and uh..." She put her handbag on the counter and looked at me with those brown eyes, framed by makeup. "I wanted to say... I mean, I wanted... uhhh... "

She looked like she was trying to work herself up to something, but I just stared. "I mean... to say... ugh" as she gave a final huff.

And then she reached up, felt briefly around the back of her neck, and pressed down hard on the switch.

The gulp, the shock, the change of control. Surprise reached my face just before she said, grinning: "I wanted to say, hi, still want to have some fun?"